Psycology of the Tattoo

Here’s the thing about tattoos. For the most part, they’re pretty bad-ass. Sure, “normal” people have them, but normal people hide them. So, showing a tattoo, means you’re not giving a fuck about what other people think of you… or you do give a fuck about what people think of you, but you want them to think a very certain thing. Bad-ass. Because that’s what you are. They should know that, I suppose.

I have this image of who I am, of what I am, of what I look like. It’s not some chick that’s 150 pounds. But it is some chick with very specific markings. I realize that there’s not been too often in my life, since I was about 12 or 14, that I didn’t see this image of myself with ink. Ink in rather specific places completely mapped out with vague ideas of the specifics… because at the time I didn’t know enough about myself to be more specific. Noone knows who they are at 12 or 14. Hell, I think it takes easily into the 20s and beyond to be that knowledgeable… to know what the ink is supposed to be, supposed to say.

I’m making myself who I’m supposed to be. This image I have of what and who and how I am. The internal has always been there. The external requires molding, shaping, coloring. I’ve never wanted to be tall. I’ve never wanted to be those teensy girls with arms like wrists and legs like arms. I’ve always wanted to look like I could kick your ass… because I’ve always wanted to be able to… because I’ve always seen myself as able to.

Funny, being the girl who never got into a fight… and I was a mouthy bitch at that. I was too good for the fight though, actually. I once told a chick she should feel free to hit me. Better make sure noone saw and that I didn’t get back up, cuz I’d so have her ass in jail for it, cuz she was hardly worth ruining my nails. I think she was kinda speechless… who knows, maybe she was just a fucking idiot. I mean, who goes around hitting other people anyway? Assholes… and that’s about it.

Anyway, I have a point here that has nothing to do with getting into fights with retarded high school girls.

I now have a tattoo in a visible place. It makes me the bad-ass. I see it every time I work out. It is freaking unbelievable how much easier the workout is when I realize I’m a frikkin bad-ass. It’s on the hand that brings the candy into contact with my mouth, and it kinda kills the moment, actually. It’s this weird, constant reminder that I should be making myself into who and what I should be. Any move that is counter that goal is stupid and shouldn’t be done. I need to be already in the headspace of who I need to be to then become that person. Who the fuck knew that a simple bracelet would get me back to that? I should have gotten this fucker years ago.

4 Responses to “Psycology of the Tattoo”

  1. kitmouse Says:

    This is very interesting to me. Huh. I know what my tat is going to be, I just haven’t found anyone I trust enough to do it yet. I’ve loved this design/image since I saw it two years ago, and I think I can trust that I will love it until I die. So it’s worth carrying on my body. Right? Unfortunately, I work in an industry where we can have NO visible tats or piercings (only ears, and then only if you’re female)…and if your clothes move and your tat flashes, that’s too much, too! Ugh!

    So I want to put my tat on rhomboids major, low enough that it won’t peak out of my collar. I’d like the visible reminder, though. I used to have a custom made bracelet that said “Integrity”, to remind me to live by what I believed. I lost it, though, the clasp broke and I didn’t notice when it fell off. Dammit.

    I’m glad your tat is powerful to you. I agree with the inner idea of who you are not matching the outer facade…I struggle with that every day. The other day someone told me that if they saw me on the street they’d assume I was a SECRETARY from IOWA, not a PT from Southern CA!! OUCH!

  2. Aoife Says:

    Best thing I can say is to find people who you really like what they have and see who they got theirs from, and check out a bunch of artists’ portfolios. You need to find someone who is good in the style you want… I mean, if you watch Miami Ink you know that you could go to Kat VonD for a portrait, but she’s really not good at the color work, find someone else… ya know? Both my artists I’m happy with. I’d go back to either, and plan to. For different things though. The one in Charlotte I like everything I’ve seen in her portfolio, I think she did a fabu job, and if there was anything on the complicated side I’d try to get in to see her. (she seems to have a busy schedule and she’s far away, hence unfortunately she’s not ideal.) The guy here that did my wrist did a fairly good job, he wasn’t comfortable doing white (hence why it’s grey). I wouldn’t necessarily feel comfortable having him to something very intricate and complicated yet, but after a couple more I might.

    hmm…
    I would never assume Secretary from Iowa, but then again there’s only been one person I’ve known that I’ve really ever thought “hmmm… Iowa.” I mean, who thinks that?

  3. kitmouse Says:

    Yeah, problem is that I don’t know ANYONE who has work that I admire, that I would like to see rendering my butterfly. Yes, yes, I know, there’s a million butterfly tattoos. But I want Picasso’s butterfly…yes, a butterfly, but the most non-standard, captivating butterfly you’ll ever see. The issue is that I don’t like faded color…

    Though if I did white…

    HEY, if I did WHITE, then…oh, WOW. What an idea!! Or barely-there color, so pale it’s a whisper…COOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!

  4. Aoife Says:

    Or the glow in the dark shit. That’d be hot. :-) well, other than the fact that it wouldn’t be color…

    Ok, so what I seriously did to find mine, because I didn’t go anywhere people I knew had gone, was to look. Therefore:
    http://www.churchofsteel.com
    http://www.avalontattoo.com/
    http://www.mastertattoo.com/index2.html
    http://www.funhousetattoosd.com/

    Then, when you find something/someone you like, you go talk to them. If they seem like you won’t like their shit or don’t want to do what you want, move along to someone else.

    Sheesh. (grin)

    There’s nothing wrong with a butterfly. Just because it’s not my bag don’t mean I’m gonna rip on someone else’s ideas.

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