Hats off to you, you Fkkin Giant Douche

Congrats, asshat in the blue Chevy pickup, licence plate FAV 895. You’re the Fucking Giant Douche of the Day award winner! Others have tried for that much coveted title… and failed… when compared to your total and completely deliberate Douche-hood.

Don’t fucking sit there and wonder why I gave you the fucking finger, you fucking douche. You know why. You pulled that wonderful fucking stunt of driving around behind me when I was backing out of a space at the postoffice. You could not be fucking bothered to WAIT A GODDAMNED second until I was done and out of the way, since I was already in your way before you even got there. NOOOOO…. you had to go ahead and squeeze behind me. Are you sure you didn’t need to get up on the curb to do it? Kinda looked like ya might’ve had to. Hope you dinged up your rim.

Your total dickyness has meant that all the other douches on the road today… those that sway and swerve in their lanes, those that don’t understand how the fucking blinkie-thingies work, those too busy talking on their phones to GO when the light turns green, those that cannot be bothered to wait until the light turns green to go as they inch ever further into the intersection (and then wait half a fucking minute to go once it does turn)…. ALL these people must bow before your complete douchyness, Mr. FAV 895. Because they… they are just annoying. Sure, sometimes they cause serious troubles for people, but none of them nearly trashed the back half of my fucking car today.

So today, the award goes to you. Way to be a fucking Douche!

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